I was screaming inside

 I was screaming inside but no words were coming out . Why me ? Why does it hurt so bad ? My memory from that night is like a fog you can't see threw it , however it's like a glass I remember pieces out it and it goes he was on top of me and their was nothing I could do , I felt so worthless I couldn't even take control over my own body or even fight back . Do you know what it's like for someone to take something so important that it makes you feel weak ? I was crying while he kept going I was in so much pain and alone I was falling in and out of consciousness , did he get me so messed up for this reason? Was this the pain the whole time ? Every night I have problems falling asleep because of you , I'm scared to go out of my own town because of you , I can't even walk at night with my heart beating like a drum . Everyone tells me to just move past it but I don't think they understand how much was taken from me , I look it the mirror and I still see the hand print bruises on my body , I haven't even be able to wash my body without hurting inside . Everyone keeps telling me I will be fine but it's a ball in my chest getting bigger and bigger like it's fixing to explode.  It's been 8 days and I can still feel his greed hands on my body taking it like he owns it , why the hell did you do this to me ! What are you supposed to do when you feel so helpless. It's like a pile of breaks on my chest . Someone hear me ,hear me screaming inside  it's 2:13 and I'm lost with my thoughts by myself what am I supposed to do when I don't even wanna wake up.